Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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