called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
