I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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