it hurts more in the daytime
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
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