I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
That accounts for only three of the penises
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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