Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Its about making memories worth repressing
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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