she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
