just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
