Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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