Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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