he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
