But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
