my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
