That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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