this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize