I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
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isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
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That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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