And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
