you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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