people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
