What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize