found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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