yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
