Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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