so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
