why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Randomize
