I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
can u get pink eye on your cock?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
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