I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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