We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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