I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing