just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
