Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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