you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
