How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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