billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
