i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
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He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
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in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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