My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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