He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
