Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
