Please don't use social media to get back at me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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