Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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