Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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