Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
