Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I did not marry a roomba.
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