shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
