I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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