okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
