guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
