Do you still have your period?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Randomize