i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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