Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I just forgot I was standing up.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
